* Hey Again Children *

* sorry, the third world dude is currently doing the dishes and can not post right now *

* Hey Children *

* sorry, the 3rd world dude is drinking beer at the moment and cannot post *

3rd World Police 0 X Cows 4

Case History

Tuesday, June 15th 2010, 10:35 am - My good  third world friend and roommate Ana Paula points out there were cows running loose all over town, and that the Campinas Police Force just couldn't catch the suckers.

Tuesday, June 15th 2010, 10:37 am - "Hey, I've seen that before.", I said to myself.

Wednesday, June 16th 2010, 3:15 pm - My good third world friend and I naïvely get ready to watch the game...

Wednesday, June 16th 2010, 6:20 pm - My good third world  friend and I party with our  third world brothers in the streets:

Wednesday, June 16th 2010, 7:03 pm - We the 3rd world fellas get suddenly hit by a pepper bomb, thrown at us by the third world Campinas Police Force. We cough. We cry. We vomit. Nonstop. Not me, though. I'm apparently immortal or something. But it was painful enough to just WATCH.

(Sorry. No pics. This reporter was saving lives instead.)

Thursday, June 16th 2010, 11:00 am - Ana Paula and I search the local newspaper and the internet but find NOTHING about the pepper bomb. Shit. So we twit about it. Thousands of people get shocked.

Analysis

The third world Campinas Police Force looked stupid chasing cows across town. The whole third world countryside town laughed at them. So they got pissed. Then they threw a freaking PEPPER BOMB on the third world countryside fellas.

 Conclusion

Everytime you look stupid, just BOMB someone and you'll feel better.

The Subject of Pain is the Business We're In

How did I first hear about Louise Bourgeois? Hm, I think it was in one of Denise Stoklos' plays - Louise Bourgeois: I do, I undo, I redo.

According to herself, as cited in the New York Times, she "often spoke of pain as the subject of her art, and fear: fear of the grip of the past, of the uncertainty of the future, of loss in the present." Many people have found her art to be intense, erotic, witty and charged with psychoanalitic implications and conflicts.

Louise Bourgeois died this morning, and crap - that got me thinking about death again.

I was never good at dealing with the idea that I could lose somebody forever, you know. Like, what people say about there being a paradise where we'll all meet our loved ones, including our dogs, cats, and turtles... I could never really buy this. But that's just me. It's just a matter of personal opinion, and I actually envy people who get comfort from that heavenly notion. To me, death really sucks, it's a DEAD END. There's nothing soothing or comforting I can say about it. It sucks and we've got to live with it. Period.

Well, not everybody shares my angelical thoughts on this though, specially my family, who is mostly Christian, and that's fine - I actually do feel better when mom tries to comfort me with that delicious chocolate candy she learned from gramma (we're talking a family secret here). But being an agnostic can be an awfully lonely thing sometimes, and I guess that's why Louise Bourgeois was special for me in a way. This arrogant, rude, witty little woman would say things like "I've been to hell and back. It was wonderful."  "The subject of pain is the business I'm in.  To give meaning and shape to frustration and suffering. (...) The existence of pain cannot be denied. I propose no remedies or excuses."

I still have no explanation why my best friend died in a motorcycle accident, or why a good friend lost her father when she was still so young, or why another good friend suddenly lost both of her parents. Death comes like a hurricane. A tsunami. A natural catastrophe. An it SUCKS.

"To give meaning and shape to frustration and suffering..."
"The existence of pain cannot be denied. I propose no remedies or excuses." 


I guess Louise's words will echoe around inside my head for a while.

The subject of pain is the business we're in.

Thanks, Louise...

But with all due respect, I'm glad we never got too close. I wouldn't want to be the owner of that penis! 

The MELECA flu - an existencial disease

While people panic and agonize over new epidemics all over the world, I'm proud to report that I got the MELECA flu, baby.

NO, it's not the Swine flu. It's not Dengue. And it's not dengo... It's the MELECA flu.

On the first days I had a sore throat. Later I started coughing like a maniac. Yesterday I had a terrible headache all day long. But the loads and loads of MELECA were a constant agony for this dude from the 3rd world. It's like, "Where is all this crap coming from? My BRAIN??"

Following a friend's advice, I finally decided to see a doctor last night. So I got out of bed, took a shower, blew a few more liters of MELECA from my nose and lungs and soon was off to the hospital. However, 20 minutes later I found myself back home blowin' some more MELECA from my nose, 'cause according to the hospital lady "Your health plan is no good here no more, honey". Oh well.

But you know, I did feel better after my beautiful wacko-bipolar-bonehead-blond proto-girlfriend called. Like, my headache was gone after we talked. She mentioned she'd had a few MELECA issues in her life too, so of course I understood what she was talking about. And I felt less lonely.

But the usual MELECA remains, of course. That just figures...

Run away. Hide. You could be next. There's no shot against MELECA in you life, brother.

Make Love and Save the Planet

A new way to save both the planet and your relationship:

Maybe it'll be clearer after you watch the video...

So...anybody up for this?

I might just try it this weekend.

Hi from the Third World Dude

Hi everybody,

I'm the 3rd World Dude and I'd like to invite you to drop by this 3rd World blog and have a cup of 3rd World tea while discussing 3rd World thoughts and perspectives on life. Please get yourself some banana leaves and have a seat. Make yourself at home.

And please remember - during these discussions you are not allowed to leave unless you spot a fire the size of 5 soccer fields in the Amazon Forest in the last 10 seconds or an oil spill misteriously underestimated to 5,000 barrels a day in the Gulf of Mexico.

Hello? Hello? Hey, where'd everybody go?